chirstamaphone

2012-01-10T22:16:00.001+13:00

well, i was pretty sad over the last few months

so much so that a few workmates have remarked on it

but now i'm pretty much back to my default setting

~~AWESOME~~

AWESOME

this is my world

2011-11-08T20:41:00.000+13:00

peace for rhys

2011-09-14T22:30:00.000+12:00

hey rhys

i can't believe it's been three years since you died - and if i can't believe it you can certainly bet on the fact that others will not believe it also - and certainly not want to believe it, if the truth is more plainly spoken

i've talked about you a bit in the last few weeks - there's been an odd set of coincidences that have lead to this

last week i had to go and visit a man who was on his final journey too, and i was privileged enough to see him for the last four or five of his good days and on one of those last days that i went to visit him and his wife i walked in, listened for a second or two and announced "that's vinyl - i'd know the quality of that sound anywhere. miles davis, too, if i'm not mistaken, 'summertime' from the 'porgy and bess' soundtrack, no?"

this won me some super big props on that day, and it segued naturally into how i knew this

so i told the story about you, and your dad, the common love of music and aural exploration you both shared and also 'fessed up about the time that i visited your house and thought that ed's giant speakers were amazingly big heaters

after the laughter died down the universe in all it's karmic circularity revealed that this man in fact was a classmate and peer of your dad's

last year i had to go to one of our old flats for work, and i was so remarkably restrained in not asking to look around - to go and see the hot water cupboard where spike spent 2 days and nights only to emerge soporific on heat and so dehydrated he drank a whole bowl of water without stopping

i satisfied myself with the living room because it was the same as i remembered it, and that reinforced my belief in my good will hunting memory - that the way i remember things is the way they were

and this picture, this one of you and me from 1995 outside linda and andy's flat on cargill street - well, that's how i remember us

and that's how we were, for such a short time in this weird game of life that i can't quite seem to learn the rules to

i remember you today

hope the time is right for it

2011-08-25T23:48:00.001+12:00

you can kid yourself for so long, and you can kid your expensive friend for so long

like, 5 years or so and counting - at least. let's just concentrate on the recent past and not ancient history

what a waste - time, money, life unlived, potential unfulfilled, yada yada yada

and then there's the two years you spent in the shit storm hell of push/pull compulsive masochism without chemical augmentation

but suddenly you're there, in the moment and with the man your life seems to have been leading up to
and even though it's everything you've wanted and hoped for and thought you'd never get - to have it is too much because it's foreign and frightening, and you find you can't ante up without more than a little something something, and then a lot more of a little something something

so you're back on the ssri slow dance in order to cope with the lovely man who is lovely to you - go fucking figure, right?

and believe me, it's a s_ l_ o_ w dance. days are weeks, weeks are months and let's not think about the possibility of years

so stick your fingers in my mouth, pull my lips back and watch me smile - oh, i take direction so so well

and god help me, but i think mr d'arcy going to catch me on my troubled portion

minerals, ice deposits

2011-08-25T23:04:00.000+12:00

rhys would have been 38 today

i still pretend he lives in wellington

i realise that's not as easy for other people in his life to do, but hey - whatever gets you through, right? (and quite obviously by you, i mean me, hey?)

when i went to pavement in auckland last year he was all i could think about through the two bottles of sauvignon blanc and the bourbon and coke chasers, surrounded by all the same people that we used to go and see pavement with at sammy's in 1993 and 1994

that's a long time ago - at least three of my lifetimes ago. quite the time warp - way more than just a jump to the left

this was always my favourite pavement song, right from the first time i heard it at the ripe old age of 17 and rhys used to say it reminded him of me, no doubt because of the line "i saw your girlfriend and she was eatin' her fingers like they're just another meal", me having been a recidivist nail biter since back in the day

he's still in my life and i think of him often - there's so much common musical discovery we had together

i just wish i could share with him some of the new stuff i've found and learned, because i miss my friend

but that's nigh on imfuckingpossible

so i'll just wait there, in the levee wash, mixin' cocktails with a plastic tipped cigar

i'll be waiting forever

when you can't see me anymore

2011-07-30T20:45:00.000+12:00

i wish it were simple

classical music

2011-07-26T23:44:00.000+12:00

left my pavement b-sides cd in the work car for a week when i was AWAY

sorry jackie

she doesn't mind when i leave billy joel or rod stewart behind, but i've come to learn she doesn't like nwa, public enemy, the beastie boys or rage against the machine

might double check with her about the sordid sentinels, though. who WOULDN'T love them?

i know, right?

when i come home to you, invercargill

2011-07-26T23:32:00.000+12:00

oh hai - i'll concede it's been a while

but do you know what?

things are pretty fucking great, actually

i get to be here in my lovely new flat, all by myself after an interesting and cool (ha! lame pun coon!) day at work

i had my wife over for dinner in said new flat and we drank wine and talked a ton and watched cruel intentions

and now i get to blast tony bennett and and sing along at the top of my lungs to my heart's content

and do you know what else?

my heart is pretty fucking content <3

the secret (agent) life of chirst

2011-07-08T18:04:00.000+12:00

i just got home from work and had a 'chuck' moment

the moment where everything pours into his mind at once

one time bajoolies said to me

"you know what? you're kind of like chuck. you live with your sibling and you have this mysterious secret other life we don't know about"

correct

it's all about the clearance

no, i'm just a fool (who plays it cool)

2011-06-14T23:27:00.002+12:00

you don't spend nearly two years in what might as well have been training for a long distance relationship without getting a few tricks up your sleeve

just how many aces i've got remains to be seen, though

as always, bro

as always

feel like i'm fading away

2011-06-14T00:14:00.001+12:00

i suspect it's because i've skipped 14-16 straight to 12-14

that really is what you call cutting out the middle (wo)man

gather round all you clowns

2011-06-13T19:55:00.000+12:00

dexterity for posterity

2011-06-10T21:48:00.000+12:00

just LOOK at his fingers! LOOK at what they can do!

oh - did i forget to mention mr d'arcy is dj too?

my mistake

blacklist

2011-06-09T20:51:00.000+12:00

"an' if ya got a problem with this

let me know so i can add ya fuckin' name on my list"

slash and burn

2011-05-30T19:17:00.001+12:00

it's what we like to air guitar to in caversham on a monday night whilst creating work car playlists

work car playlists to be distributed to the rest of the gang

yes, gang

we've got names and a fist bump and everything

this is your health dollar hard at work, people

the tender trap

2011-05-25T23:14:00.000+12:00

i never thought one of the things i could say to woo a boy would be

"actually, sweetie, i think you'll find it's admiral ackbar who says "it's a trap!""

thank you, brain :)

brain no go

2011-05-04T23:57:00.000+12:00

i warned you somewhere around the 3 and a half week mark that this was too much time to be away from work

and then with the unfortunate event and subsequent recovery it's been nearly six weeks

the interweb can pull you in

just
like
that

and unhinge your tiny little mind

perfect comic timing

2011-05-02T23:12:00.000+12:00

i watched "family guy:it's a trap" for the first time today

i could not believe the timing, bro - it was comically topical and eerie at the same time

superfly tnt

2011-04-30T18:22:00.000+12:00

see more Memebase and check out our Troll Face lols!

why, yes

yes, i am

infernal monologue

2011-04-28T09:49:00.001+12:00

see more Memebase and check out our Troll Face lols!

it's kind of like when you're out walking with your ipod on and you feel like you're in a music video or a film

don't do the narration out loud, though

that's a no-no

i'm too much i'm too much comforted here

2011-04-24T00:15:00.001+12:00

this is the other single pavement released in 1995

i saw them play at sammy's in 1993 and 1994 and then i got to see them last year on the awesome trip with my girl carrie - who was originally going to live in the york place monstrosity too

it has some of my favourite lyrics in it of all time

"callin' the bluffs, talkin' so tough
goodbye to the ugly steeple fear"

this is (quite obviously) me being a rock chick in 1995

and then i became wildly successful and had to record an unplugged session, too

if you wear your pyjama top all the time you only have to get dressed half as much

grunge was the only thing i wore for years

it was a hard habit to break

kiss me into the past

2011-04-23T23:24:00.004+12:00

back in 1995 i was living in a violent green monstrosity on york place with rhys, jim and susan
we would hang out with kelly (jim's girlfriend and now wife), linda and andy and sometimes susan's friend angela
it was the year i started liking friends, seinfeld and er. sebadoh, beck and guided by voices
i saw throwing muses play at orientation
i went to some university, but not a lot
we had a dress up party where i dyed my hair black and cut a fringe in so i could be uma thurman from pulp fiction

in the last month i have caught up with jim and kelly, linda (and grant, but he didn't exist for us yet back here) susan and angela

linda and grant had photos from back in this time and we got to sit around and tell stories about that year, which was pretty cool, especially because i got to play photography csi (what can i say? i has a gift)

jim and kelly and i watched the video he made back in 1995, which shows all of us at the flat, my cat spike lee included

tonight after dinner at etrusco with susan and angela, i drove susan and i past the old house on york place - it's still luminous green on it's city facing flank

and do you know what? on my trip to wellington the other week, i read kristen hersh's book about the early throwing muses days and the onset of her bipolar disorder

i'm totally digging this circularity, universe. we all know i love the 90s - well, 1995 was one of my favourite years and these people were (and still are) among my favourite people

and we all look pretty much the same as we always did, just kinda better. well, i think, anyway :)

long < > ision

2011-04-21T14:47:00.004+12:00

always

the

correct

number

check please

2011-04-19T22:14:00.000+12:00

i think i might need to check my own self

maybe

lolcat of the day

2011-04-14T21:06:00.000+12:00

just imagine if i discovered something

a non prescription something

that promises to help with

sleep

anxiety

mood

stress

nightmares

weight loss

headaches

and now 'mask' with eric stoltz and cher is on tv

it really IS year of the rabbit, y'all

so why i've not yet bought a single lotto ticket this year is beyond me

cucina amore

2011-04-14T00:17:00.001+12:00

do you know what?

i think i will make spinach and ricotta cannelloni for dinner on friday night

i've just been having a wee consult with my man jamie, and i think we're looking good

i'm also thinking an interesting green salad with fresh herbs, toasted pumpkin seeds, crumbled bacon and home made croutons teamed with my mean as secret vinaigrette recipe - it's first outing since retirement 8 years ago

and i do believe some of that mammoth peanut butter ice cream will finish things nicely

i might need to wear my new skinny girl skirt and new purple italian leather pointy toed cuban heeled ankle boots for the event, though

hey - you know nigella would

pot, kettle

2011-04-12T10:19:00.001+12:00

i think the reason i find hipster kitty so funny is she's a little too close to the bone sometimes

ha ha

"close to the bone!"

so mature, bro

also, last week i felt a little bit hipster kitty, putting on my skinny black trousers and high top black converse for my walk through newtown

but it was like a uniform

no

camouflage

pyroclastic flow from the volcano girl

2011-04-08T22:26:00.000+12:00

dear internet i <3 you mc chirsty XXX

good, beta, best

2011-04-04T17:00:00.002+12:00

just back from extended weekend away, where i got to go to some really amazing places that i can't believe i've never visited before

planning my week in wellington, which kicks off on wednesday - my posse's always ready and they're waitin' in my zone

chilling out at princess fiona's and getting ready to go for a walk with myresa - i think the exercise train might be cranking up. might, but can't rightly say just yet

the knowledge that i've made someone's day and they've yet to discover it but it could be anytime from now

i think there's something in this year of the rabbit business, y'all

ruff stuff

2011-03-30T23:01:00.001+13:00

i think the corona is going into indie music withdrawal

i've got news for it regarding the musical choices for friday's road trip

and buddy,

it's all bad

the pursuit of happiness

2011-03-20T20:25:00.000+13:00

lie in
breakfast at starfish out on the balcony
walk on the beach
baby shower
'breaking bad' - season one
early night

i forgot sundays could be like this

outlook for thursday

2011-03-17T12:44:00.000+13:00

mighty MIGHTY headache - segue into day 1, 2, 3

impertinent weather hampering my efforts to empty the laundry hamper
(ok, that's where for 'laundry hamper' read 'entire floor of bedroom')

kitchen bench completely occupied with dishes of the dirty variety

a copy of 'jarhead' that needs to be watched before i return it 2 days ago

grocery shopping to be done

bathroom to be cleaned

otherwise fine

fine, fine, fine

lolcat of the day

2011-03-07T17:36:00.001+13:00

hey

i just sent myself a text to the work cellphone i will be using tomorrow

which means

i won't get it til tomorrow

i wonder what it says

solitaire

2011-02-14T10:02:00.000+13:00

today is not a day to wallow

today is a day for giving thanks

i give thanks that i am single

and

i give thanks that i didn't end up with anyone i've met in the last couple of years

chur, universe - you had my back all along

muy appreciada

diametrically opposed

2011-02-07T05:56:00.000+13:00

this is how i started my monday
i woke up and realised i suddenly really like ratm
kinda like how i woke up last week and realised i liked rod stewart

i'm lying in bed, having been awake since four
thought i'd truly get the jump on this monday, bro
so i watched the rest of "grown ups", which was a nice little movie
and now i'm lying in bed, planning my day if not my week

coffee. coffee in a big way needs to be part of my morning

sunday night playlist

2011-01-30T22:15:00.000+13:00

the getz and i like it when this comes on solid gold fm 90.2 dunedin

prepare for relaunch

2011-01-28T14:28:00.001+13:00

bought myself some new running shoes this morning

they're the exact model i bought 14 months ago

but in a different colour

i sure do like to live life on the edge

i forgot about my left foot being markedly bigger than the right

it gave me something to talk about with the cute running shoe boy @ smiths

myresa said "why didn't you ask him out?" via a text message on the cellular mobile telephone

because he was about 25, that's why

and also because i think i would die before asking someone out face-to-face

prepare for relaunch of atonement anytime soon

not sure exactly when

but for now we'll stick with soup, yoghurt, fruit and sugar free v

too legit to quit

2011-01-20T17:37:00.003+13:00

i spent a good amount of time cleaning out the mighty corona today

like, 3 hours or so

some of this time was due to dealing with the large pools of water that had collected in the boot underneath the spare tyre and the tool well. blech

and i took it to this cool warrant place on hillside road, where you just drive in and they do it while you read john irving novels in the waiting room

the man came up to me and said, "now, just a couple of things"

which i knew would happen. one of the things was the chip in my windscreen. i'd had it fixed by novus and i was a bit dubious about it, because it still looked pretty chippy and pretty star shaped to me. so i made them write a stamped and signed work order saying that they had fixed it to some proper standard. which is what i showed the man and he ticked it off the list. hurrah for me!

the other thing was the smashed and mangled passenger side mirror. now, the ltsa vehicle testing station has been passing this for the last three years, so i never thought it was a problem. the man said i either had to get it covered or remove it. i said i'd remove it and then he fetched some tools and did it right there on the spot. there's a black triangle bit of the side of the door where the mirror used to be, and he said "just get your husband to fold an icecream pottle or something and put it in there and it'll look fine". and i said "ok, i will". yes, yes. i know.

when i went to pay and get the registration (for! a! year! totally mature, bro) sorted out i asked him "where would i get my windscreen washer fixed? it doesn't squirt anymore even though there's water in it". he said "i've fixed it already for you" and i was super super happy. the end

let sleeping dogs lie

2011-01-19T23:38:00.000+13:00

yes
my new favourite song is from 1973
i like to awooo oooooo oooooo oooooo oooooo yeah around town with the window down and the radio up

que cera cera

2011-01-17T23:25:00.001+13:00

i'm still driving around this fair city with solid gold fm on the work car wireless
i hear this song at least once a day
and i just about pmsl
every
single
time
without fail

i can has suck

2011-01-09T10:37:00.001+13:00

text messages between me and my brother lately

chirst: hey, did you ask bajoolies if i can have your old vacuum cleaner?

david: you can have the vacuum. i abhor it

chirstmas cheer

2010-12-25T12:47:00.000+13:00

yesterday was a very busy day at work, and i was a bit vacant, a bit drained, a bit had-it by the time i finished
but i thought i would push and get the rest of my chores done after work, and it wasn't too bad
so by the time i came home to the caversham palace, chilled out a bit and put my tired little chirst feet up in front of sky i was a bit vacant and bit sorry for myself
but then the universe smiled upon me
"elf" with will ferrell and zooey deschanel was just starting
and
it was then followed by "13 going on 30" with jennifer garner and mark "mr chirsty" ruffalo
i had forgotten how much i love this film
i used to have my own copy but i loaned it to someone and they skipped the country with it
and the "thriller" scene was just the pick me up i needed
what's even more awesome is that i've stopped home for a break during my work day today and caught it again

yay for chirst!

cheesy chirstday

2010-12-21T23:48:00.000+13:00

so, um, yeah
me gettin' mah cheese on a couple of years ago before the shortening and the reddening

shark week

2010-12-21T17:51:00.000+13:00

hmmmm

short hair

short t-rex forearms

mighty mighty hangover

i think jaws has the advantage here

alt grrl

2010-12-21T17:23:00.003+13:00

oh, i know
i'm so predictable
alternative american guitar music from the 90s
shocking
positively shocking

a chirst by any other name

2010-12-21T17:07:00.002+13:00

(chronological order
1975 - present day)

chrissy

chrissy lizzy

christobel

chris

bean

beanches

cootie

beanagator

gator

gatie

gates

cootie-adile

crash beanacootie

bundle

moobly

chirstine

chirst

chirsty

chirstinator

chirstamaphone
little princess

hipster chick

retro chick

mcchirsty

chirstday

2010-12-21T15:46:00.002+13:00

ever had to compete with teh interweb for attention?

you betcha i can identify with that cat

today is the hottest, windiest day ever

i've had to cancel all of my important and busy plans and concentrate on wilting on the bed with the pretty acer and the book i'm reading and the beer i'm going to get from the fridge right the fuck now

i have to do recuperating after going out for lunch and in preparation for going out for dinner

look, i don't want to be rude but i'd better get back to it - i had a trial go this morning, lying in bed until 1130 listening to james morrison and i think with a bit of effort i can make some progress in this area

entourage - season 6

2010-12-15T21:59:00.004+13:00

grr

calling twelve 22 minute episodes an entire season is bullshit (nurse jackie, listen up)
where the fuck is vince? like, where the fuck is he all season?
nothing really happens. seriously
the cameos - less and weaker, save the last episode
drama is nowhere near as crazy (which = funny)
ari is dilute - ari needs to be barely in control and incendiary with vengeance
no one says "fuck!" enough. fuck!
drug use and sex scenes have withered to paltry proportions. i like drugs and fucking. in my tv shows.
everyone (except blackberry toting ari) has iphones. yawn
no hilarious shenanigans like the mushrooms at joshua tree
no standout quotes (who doesn't want something to look "i'm gonna beat that old fuck and throw him in the pool. only daddy talks that way, kids!" square in the eyes? i sure as fuck do)
not as many cars and gadgets and toys. i like cars and gadgets and toys
nz airways - wtf? and also wtf with the hostie's accent?
dana gordon? where's everyone's favourite ex assistant who liked to be penetrated in cabo in the 90s?

meh

the music is still good, but it doesn't kick the ass that it has in the past

america, fuck yeah!

ladyhawke is playing in episode 10
turtle scrubs up well - and flies across the world for love when most can't drag themselves halfway across an urban postcode
lloyd!!
matty fuckin' d, man! matty fuckin' d!
terence (gasp!)
it's still l.a
it's still hollywood business
it's still cool

please mind the gap

2010-12-02T11:50:00.000+13:00

o hai

so, like, nothing much happened in november

clearly

more later

maybe

thirsty chirsty

2010-10-30T16:04:00.000+13:00

last night i had what i think will be the first of many drinks with my new work friend

and today i feel mightily hungthefuckover

so when i went to the supermarket my purchases were engineered to help assuage the terrible and fearsome super thirst i've been afflicted with since about 2300 last night

i submit for your persusal:

sugar free v - can, 500ml
superjuice 'balance' - bottle, 1l
superjuice 'upbeet' - bottle, 1l
l&p sweet as - bottle, 1.5l
barker's lemon barley cordial - bottle, 710ml
frank sparkling tangy blood orange - bottle, 1.25l
mac's gold all malt lager - bottles (330ml), 12

go kidneys, go!!

lolcat of the day

2010-10-20T00:21:00.001+13:00

it so is, bro

lament for a monday

2010-10-18T11:02:00.000+13:00

thank you 'weeds' for expanding my alt music base

and for being right on the money for my monday

except for the wating by the phone part

god bless teh interweb

2010-10-16T00:02:00.000+13:00

lol. cats!

free market

2010-10-05T13:39:00.001+13:00

fuck off, telemarketer

you don't give a good goddamn how my day is going, thank you very much

don't you fucking invade my private world and try to make me feel shit about saying no to your cause

i KNOW it's a worthy cause. i've given fucking money to it before

did you wanna hear a few sad stories yourself? i've got a couple of goodies, you know

no? really?

yeah, piss off, then

this is exactly why i don't often answer the phone

like now. i'm ignoring it again, right now

day's dawning, skin's crawling, pure morning

2010-10-05T05:29:00.005+13:00

oh, i'll admit it

right the fuck straight up, bro

cos at the moment i've made my bed again to not sleep in it

again

and this could be any of several handfuls of days over the last few years

but i'm willing to throw something different into the mix

i'm not afraid in the least of disturbing the time space continuum - bring that shit the fuck on, is what i say to you

the time space continuum? yes, well, here is a selection of what i consider to be the most helpful films to discuss the time space continuum and the inherent dangers of fucking with it yet also highlighting the enormous pay off if you can fuck it right:

the terminator series
the back to the future series
the bill and ted films
hot tub time machine
the butterfly effect

there, so now that we're all schooled up in the mechanics and semantics of time travel, hurry the fuck up and get me some plutonium for the flux capacitor i've spent a good part of my sleepless night installing in the mighty corona so that i can nip back a bit and sort some of this business out

off to sort out these useless, painful, interminably long and torturously repetitive days once and the fuck for all

i'm sure through carefully controlled reconstruction of certain events of the past i'll be able to throw in a few self centered indulgences along the way, not to mention rewarding those of true and loyal persuasion - i'll start that fucking list right the fuck now, since you brought it up

it's not like i don't fucking deserve it now, is it? so don't be alarmed if i'm suddenly far thinner, even smarter (pttssch! as if, right?) and quite a lot fucking wealthier than you remember from the other day

happier, too. keep that in the foremost of your mind as i deal to the detritus and debris from the past that's caused havoc in what should be a happy happy life

oh, and in an unpdate a few hours later, teh intahweb delivers this. click it, oh do it, do it

not everyone is here

2010-10-05T03:09:00.001+13:00

you'd think this monday would be good and fuckin' done and dusted, eh?

you really fuckin' would

i think it might be next week already

but who would know, right?

what i do know however, is if i were one of the finn brothers i'd bet my bottom fuckin' dollar i'd be tim

you can see that, right?

when the finns toured in 2004 i went to see them two nights in a row - first in dunedin and then pretty much front row the following evening in christchurch. we watched neil stroll through the foyer and the restaurants of the crowne plaza hotel from the lofty perch that was the club lounge - you can sink a fair few "free" voddies in 2 hours up there, you know. in the christchurch town hall tim used an old school playskool microphone and "amp" for a few wrecks'n'effects, particularly during "i see red". hey - i have red hair, you know - not too shabby a segue for this time of night, really, when all things are considered

in 1984 we were staying with my mum's cousin winnie and her second husband in matamata and tim finn's "fraction too much friction" was being thrashed to fuckin' death on every single radio station from end to end of split enzed. in fact, every time i see or hear the word "friction" i think of that song and that holiday. that was the holiday where me and my sister pretended to get shut in the downstairs room and ironically ended up stuck there for two hours until someone heard us shouting through the ventilation

i've been playing a fuckload of crowded house, split enz and the finn brothers in the mighty corona lately - and in the work rocket. in fact, i like to go and park up on john wilson drive most days, working or not, and drink something laden with caffeine and stare at the water for a while, listening to new zealand music and letting the hamster run on his wheel. he's spinning pretty fast lately, you know

funnily enough, i had a quasi-stalker this year who was not dissimilar in appearance to tim

in other news, i used the word "incendiary" in an everyday conversation tonight, much to the mirth of the other participant. but she said the "c" word first, and you can bet it wasn't for fuckin' "cookie" and oh how i laughed then

i use too many words altogether, really, and maybe i should just shut the fuck up sometimes

so

i think i'll watch another episode of outrageous fortune and just drop out for a bit longer

night's still young, hey?

red queen

2010-10-02T15:30:00.000+13:00

i said a transformation was taking place

didn't i?

full house

2010-10-02T10:38:00.000+13:00

and then the nurse beside me at work laughed because she saw me loading up my stuff to take to the work car and she heard me say "come on neil, i'll show you round dunedin this morning" to my crowded house cd

the unforkitten

2010-09-29T18:41:00.000+13:00

dude
like, no way!

never better, thanks

2010-09-23T22:19:00.000+12:00

"i've got the magic in me

i am complete is what i'm sayin"

jinkies

2010-09-17T14:34:00.000+12:00

hey, you know how the other day i thought i looked like a grown up real life pebbles flintstone?

well, i think i've also realised that i'm a hybrid of velma and shaggy

i know

just think if i used my brain for constructive purposes

my velouria

2010-09-05T23:17:00.001+12:00

currently i'm resting on top of my freshly made, completely changed bed

resting because i was busting a few too many moves to this beastie boys song

busting moves in my underwears

i've spent today dressed in head to toe velour - which was kind of an accident (even more than it sounds!) - didn't realise until i was at the video store getting cop out and the royal tennenbaums for to watch in bed with the sticky ribs and the pizza and the dessert pizza

it was kind of like yesterday when i realised i'd wandered around and interacted with many members of the human race wearing my black hoodie that i forgot had a ben 10 sticker on it

a ben 10 sticker i got for being a good chirsty

i like rewards

silver lining

2010-09-05T20:16:00.000+12:00

what can i say?

if i had a real live boyfriend then i doubt i'd be allowed to spend the evening in bed eating hell pizza spare ribs (and getting them all over the sheets, slatternly wench!) and watching "cop out"

(look, i know, i know, but i can't resist the buddy cop genre, i'm a little bit addicted to tracy morgan and the catchline is "rock out with your glock out" - i mean, come on!)

guitar hero

2010-09-05T18:08:00.000+12:00

http://www.latenightwithjimmyfallon.com/submit-a-video/index2.shtml

this is what my life has been building towards!

i can play guitar!
i can play pavement songs on my guitar!
i live in america!
i...oh, wait

yeah, okay

you've got me there

the proof of the pudding is in the eating, so bite me

2010-09-05T14:10:00.003+12:00

here's the thing

i am actually a pretty good cook

it's come to my attention that some people think i don't know what a kitchen is

well, that's just a fallacy

just for instance

i have a go-to special dish that i cook when i'm in the wooing phase

it's not flashy flashy master chef, but it's a pretty decent and delicious spinach and ricotta cannelloni dish

usually i put a complicated salad on the menu, too

a tricky and tasty dessert

plus whatever it is that i've found out you like to drink

and if you'd come to dinner on that day you would have eaten, drunk and beheld a surfeit of flavours

in fact, i've all sorts of treats and culinary delights with which to feed my potential love

but circumstances over the last couple of years have meant that unleashing my unbridled kitchen bitch skills in the name of love/lust/poor judgement has been a bit of a challenge

never mind

oh, and just by the by

this does not in any way shape or form constitute me pulling my fucking woolly head in

and oh, hey look! i managed to spell that word right for you that time, too

no, you're welcome

we can't all get 96% in school cert english, now can we?

like all the things you can't explain

2010-09-04T19:27:00.000+12:00

i would risk my neck again

again

rock my world

2010-09-04T05:15:00.000+12:00

guilty

shake 'n wake

2010-09-04T05:07:00.001+12:00

New Zealand Earthquake Report - Sep 4 2010 at 4:35 am (NZST)Magnitude 7.4, Saturday, September 4 2010 at 4:35 am (NZST), 30 km west of Christchurch.
Quake Details
Information about this earthquake:

Reference Number 3366146/G
Universal Time September 3 2010 at 16:35
NZ Standard Time Saturday, September 4 2010 at 4:35 am
Latitude, Longitude 43.54°S, 172.23°E
Focal Depth 33 km
Richter magnitude 7.4
Region Canterbury
Location 10 km south-east of Darfield
20 km east of Coalgate
30 km west of Christchurch

never was, never will be

2010-09-01T17:20:00.000+12:00

do you guys have, like, a fucking club or something?

with little meetings and tiny agendas?

i mean, sewiusly

William S. Burroughs - The hipster be bop junkie

2010-08-28T00:05:00.000+12:00

when i was 17 i used to like william s burroughs

friday flashback

2010-08-28T00:00:00.000+12:00

i saw william s burroughs at pak 'n save tonight after the gym

lunch break

2010-08-27T12:24:00.001+12:00

oh poor me

i get to go home for lunch and hang out and do interweb and eat treats and be in the sun

it's tremendously awful

sewiusly

wednesday playlist - three

2010-08-25T22:35:00.001+12:00

this song reminds me of two different people, one of them being amberley

i like toast with real butter and bitter marmalade for supper

oh, this song also reminds me of ME

it sure is easy to forget what you learned

wednesday playlist - two

2010-08-25T21:50:00.000+12:00

i really really really really really really really love my new job

wednesday playlist - one

2010-08-25T21:45:00.001+12:00

tonight at work i got to drive the great big kickass 4 wheel drive

sorry corona

i always did like to be a cheater

wednesday playlist - one

2010-08-25T21:45:00.000+12:00

tonight at work i got to drive the great big kickass 4 wheel drive

sorry corona

i always did like to be a cheater

rhys's pieces

2010-08-25T12:15:00.000+12:00

hi rhys

happy birthday

it's been quite a year

i saw pavement again for the first time since we last saw them at sammy's in 1994, and i've managed to see the pixies twice (twice!) this year

i've seen heather a couple of times, but not nearly as much as i should - time tends to trip me up lately and blocks of it disappear into the ether

i've got a new job and some new friends

in some ways, things have never been better, but in other ways things seem to be getting worse

i'm just kind of going with the flow at this point

hope you're ok - i'm just going to keep pretending you live in wellington, if that's ok with you

you know how good i am with closure

love chirst

insult/injury

2010-08-24T21:38:00.002+12:00

television - are you fucking kidding me?

just cut it the fuck out and give me a fucking break, ok?

sewiusly

"that's JUST what you're like"

2010-08-24T18:07:00.001+12:00

ladies and gentlemen - i give you ME

chirstamaflintstone

2010-08-23T22:32:00.002+12:00

do you know, i just had the strangest revelation

i realised, whilst looking in the mirror, if i scrunch my hair up on the top of my head

i look not too dissimilar to how i imagine pebbles flintstone would look if she was a real life person, in her mid thirties and wore glasses

sewiusly
yabba dabba doo

are you just cool but i'm just baked?

2010-08-23T21:46:00.002+12:00

i'm just so relieved that it's over
we were hanging out going nowhere

air guitaring to james blunt on a monday night in the 'burbs
it's the new yoga/knitting/lolcats

it's sewius bizness indeed
so
cop on

television revision

2010-08-22T19:27:00.001+12:00

two and half men

simon is to charlie as christine is to rose

this one time, not at band camp, i snorted an excellent sauvignon blanc out of my nose when i was watching two and a half men and charlie said "hop on, i'll race you to the finish"

sewius bizness indeed

lolcat of the day

2010-08-22T12:20:00.000+12:00

vewwy sewius bizness indeed

and is it just me, or will this lolcat haunt your brain with it's hilarity?

yes

perhaps it IS just me

where is my mind?

2010-08-13T23:29:00.001+12:00

i wish i could explain it

but god help me, i love this song

oh look - i did it again, i toats mcgoats forgot to check the link - so watch it here instead

sticks and rolling stone(r)s

2010-08-13T23:15:00.001+12:00

this week i've been called:

a lolcat (two different people)
nurse zoe (two different people - one the same as the lolcat calling)
bridget (one person - also implicated in teh lolcat)

you'd think i'd have more to write about

you really would

hard of harem

2010-08-05T09:39:00.001+12:00

i bet she still looks for other boys at the same time

no one puts all their money on THAT horse

still gotta see it run, though, hey?

oh, righto - embedding disabled by request - click here then

atonement

2010-08-01T23:55:00.000+12:00

wednesday

boxing - 30 minutes

friday

weights - 30 minutes

saturday

advanced spin class - 90 minutes

anticipatory grief

2010-07-30T09:58:00.004+12:00

oh god
oh god
oh god

i don't want to get up
getting up will make today happen and it's going to be oh so very hard for me
(in a whisper *so very hard*)

to begin with, i'm physically ruined. i did hard out abs stuff with richard on wednesday (atonement to be updated - along with the 3 week diet recall, yes, yes, i know chirstmas is coming too, hold your waters) and now i'm still in pain. actual pain. and yet at midday i'll be back at the gym, paying richard to inflict yet more pain on me. because there's not too many ways to stop being a great big ugly manatee of a girl, and this corporal punishment is one of them

but the worst thing, the thing that i've been doing a build up to over the last few days is this: it's my very last day at my job on the ward i've worked on for the last 5 years. gulp.

my last educator day was on tuesday, and today is the third of three afternoon shifts on the ward. i thought it would be a bit sad and bit hard, but the last two afternoons have involved increasingly difficult goodbyes with people, and today is the great big guest-of-honour afternoon tea. people are coming in on their days off and people haven't been able to mention it without getting teary over the last few days.

i knew i fitted in pretty well at work, and i got on pretty well with most people. i felt blessed to have such a good group of people to work with, and a good handful of those people became close friends. but the outpouring of love and sorrow in my direction over the recent past has been overwhelming.

gulp

i AM excited about my new job, but leaving my very first grown up job where i've made so many friends and gained such vast experience (that allowed me to get said new job) is heartwrenching

oh god
oh god
oh god

i'm going to hide in bed for a little bit more and listen to tony bennett and think about everything that is breaking my heart

it's not a long list, but it's an acute list and it fucking hurts

"so it seems that i'm someone i've never met"

2010-07-28T00:13:00.000+12:00

"things have changed for me, and that's okay
i feel the same, I'm on my way, and I say
things have changed for me, and that's okay…

i want to go where everyone goes
i want to know what everyone knows
i want to go where everyone feels the same

i never said I'd leave the city
i never said I'd leave this town
a falling out we won't tiptoe about"

nurse chirsty

2010-07-27T22:35:00.000+12:00

oh, fuck me but i am so fucking tired and over it

i pick sitting here with an excellent bottle of jules taylor 09 sauvignon blanc augmented with a few choice goodies over the alternative that is only very occasionally somewhat available for a limited time after a great big mind fuck before and after

it's somewhat akin to being on the methadone program but still having a weekly (or fortnightly, it's never up to you) heroin binge but kidding yourself that you're clean, you're giving up, you can handle it, it's just a bit of fucking fun, man

it's not fucking fun, man

it will kill you

office space

2010-07-27T19:44:00.000+12:00

oh hai

and welcome to the end of a little chunk of my life

for the last 18 months or so i have held a reasonably grown up post at the hospital as part time clinical nurse educator for my service. i've also been part time senior rn on the ward, but managed to be fulltime AWESOME

and today was the last of my educmacator days (*last*)

i had a lovely lunch out where i was the guest of honour, and i have been super productive all day. it's been a looooooooooong day, given i got here just after 8am and it's now getting close to 8pm

i've thrown out approximately 7 trees worth of paper whilst throwing myself around to the live cd of the pixies concert i attended in auckland - i finally realised just how drunk i/we were when i discovered that the concert was twenty times as long as i remembered and the first song i recognised was quite near the end. in a nice touch of circularity my screensaver in my (former) office is a picture of me, mygirlcarrie and her husband chirs outside vector arena pre-concert. none of us remember having that photo taken, but jebus do we look like we're having fun. this presages tuesday where we're all reuniting in chirstchurch to see the pixies again - hey!

so, i've been saying goodbyes all day and talking about the past and the present and the future, and i've even paid someone $85/hour for the privilege of doing the same

therefore, i think a little treat is in order in chirstamaphone world

tonight's forecast:

nice bottle of savignon blanc - i feel an astrolabe coming on
thai takeaways from thai hanoi - spare ribs and chicken tom kar, om nom nom
nurse jackie
marlboro lights

that's right - i'm gonna drink, eat, smoke and chill the fuck out

so, educator's office - kthxbai

recap the hurt

2010-07-25T12:14:00.000+12:00

just to remind you, let's take a look at the exercise quotient for the last week:

monday - biking and strength testing
monday - spin class
wednesday - spin class
thursday - spin class
friday -strength testing and boxing
saturday - advanced spin class (aka revolutions of death whilst caning your core)

so, looking at this list there are very good reasons as to why i'm in a world of hurt right now

no, i really am

i'm lying in bed, and as soon as i get remotely comfortable i have to change position and stretch

it takes about 2 minutes for the comfort to wear off

i'm like a stop motion animation

make sure you buy the action figure coming out soon

it'll be a hooT

atonement

2010-07-24T14:42:00.002+12:00

advanced spin class - 90 min

bed or shower?

what

conundrum

there will have to be a regeneration on a massive scale

in order to be in tip top form for hitting the town tonight

captain picard says ":make it so"

kthxbai

atonement

2010-07-23T23:56:00.000+12:00

final fitness test - bench press 30kg 20 times
boxing - 25 minutes

very
very
tired

atonement

2010-07-22T19:52:00.000+12:00

spin class - 50 min

and ha ha, stinky - other side of the class from YOU

atonement

2010-07-21T23:08:00.000+12:00

spin class - 50 min

and next time i won't sit behind that stinky stinky boy whose stench made me gag every time the fan made a pass *retch*

he should also get that giant sticky out mole i could see through his singlet checked out, too

i swear, it nearly needed it's own bike

atonement

2010-07-19T18:56:00.001+12:00

1130

fitness testing, where i was categorised as "average", probably because this time i didn't have gastritis and i also managed to
LEG PRESS 100KG 21 TIMES

1315

spin class - 50 minutes

1630

45 minute walk around ross creek

consequently, i am very, very tired

i've lived it up a bit much over the weekend, and two nights of 4 hours sleep doesn't cut it
so tonight i might go to bed at 2030

if i can stay up that long

atonement

2010-07-16T12:42:00.002+12:00

atonement is cancelled today due to gastritis

thank you

atonement

2010-07-15T13:17:00.000+12:00

wednesday

spin class (50 min) with two complimentary cramps for two calves (mine)

thursday

demoralizing fitness testing whereby i get categorised as "poor"
20 min on the crosstrainer with my heart rate 180+

i don't know why it's called the cross trainer and why i should have to use it
i'm plenty cross already and i don't need any fucking training in it

so in general, universe, get fucked and fuck off, ok? good

atonement

2010-07-12T23:00:00.002+12:00

ok, so today held a trick or three

first of all there was the humiliating measurements and assessments

height
weight
bmi
blood pressure
measurements of every possible chirstcumference (i TOLD myresa my right calf was bigger than the left calf, i told her, i told her)
fat pinching
photographs (front, side on and back views) taken in bike shorts and crop top

and then there was

spin bike class (45 minutes)

and the eating and the planning and the denial went swimmingly well until later on tonight when i realised i was into my third glass of wine and cigarettes may or may not have been smoked and there was a bowl in the kitchen that had the remnants of raspberry icecream and choc magic incriminatingly melted onto it

i only stopped paying rigorous attention to myself for one minute and look what happened

just LOOK

it's true

i AM my own worst enemy