star me (lol)kitten

the emails i accidentally signed up to receive from an astrology website a couple of years ago keep trickling in. they do make me laugh though, especially the ones i've received in the last two weeks:

• what is your relationship potential?
• is your relationship meant to be?
• uranus turns retrograde - expect the unexpected!
• are you two a perfect match?
• resolve conflicts in your relationship!
• is it time to move on?

when my what now turns retrograde?