lolcat of the day

this is me
this cat, with it's head in a bag of fud - it's me

i was doing ok for a while after i came back from my awesome holiday in chch and then recovered from the terrible cold i promptly contracted

but then the dysthymia kicked in
and the stress at work
and the mid life crisis
and the delicate birthday paradigm
and something else started up again
and the last week where i had no less than 5 social engagements to fulfill

so i decided that tomorrow, which is technically today (this keeps happening to me) it stops

i have to stop with the eating everything that isn't nailed down and i have to start with the rigorous punishing exercise

AGAIN

so today, and yesterday, and somewhat the day before - i've been eating everything and anything i want
and even some things that i don't
i certainly wasn't being treatwise

it's like addicts that get loaded on the way to rehab

but tomorrow i am walking the pineapple track with jenny from work
and
i have a slow cooker full of vegetable soup simmering in the kitchen

so suck it, universe

suck it good

the queen of corona

today, in the corona

transcendentally loud

"how can i? how can i?

how can i make my body shed for you?"

three quarter saturbeday

i spent a lot of today in bed.  in fact, i'd go so far as to say i spent 75% of today in bed

i went out with mygirlcarrie last night, and despite having to go home at 12.15am because of the tiredness, i had a great time and managed to consume nearly a week's worth of alcohol units in one night.  it really is the way we're drinking, isn't it?

i stopped at the tai ping on the way to the taxi stand, and  i cuddled my little parcel of warmth all the way home.  because dude, it was fucking freezing last night!

when i got home i quickly made my way into pyjamas and polar fleece dressing gown, and hopped into bed with the electric blanket on, all set to devour my treats and some of season 2 of 'the big bang theory'.  now, this was all fine and dandy until i woke up at 3.30am, sitting bolt upright, ass warmed to within an inch of it's life and the theme song from big bang on loop.  no wonder i was having extremely strange dreams!

so today, i got up late, and went to hell pizza to fetch more treats (look, this is because monday is the start of the new deprivation and exercise regime.  it'll either kill me or make me look and feel awesome - either's good by me) and returned to my bed and watched 'bad boys' with martin lawrence and will smith.  i watched it very very loud and it was great.  you can't beat a michael bay directed jerry bruckheimer production for guns, men without shirts running in slow motion, gun battles, explosions, car chases/wrecks and explosions.  tons and tons of explosions.  th eonly thing that would have made it better was if i could have watched it on my 42 inch lcd true hd tv that i haven't bought myself and also haven't hooked up to my as yet unpurchased home theater system

this evening i went to a jewellery party at mykaryn's.  it was very nice and i took my bajoolies and we had a very good time.  i also spent half of my birthday money on a necklace and a ring for myself.  and in the corona the way home i played bajoolies some pavement and tried to infect her with my enthusiasm for the sordid sentinels.  i really am obsessed at the moment.  once i finish this and shut the pretty acer down and i'm waiting patiently for my herbal insomnia relieving tablets (they're as big as bricks!  truly!) to work, i'm going to read a book about a guy who was obsessed with guided by voices (excellent lo fi band) - we have the same taste in music, and it's cool to read books about cool bands that i know

tomorrow (which is really today - i think i'm at risk for day/night reversal here) i hope to tidy up my room a bit.  it's getting a bit out of control.  i'd also like to address the unstable pile gaining momentum in the corona.  i left the driver's window slightly down on friday night, thus the moisture content of the vehicle is unsatisfactorily high 

and then i want to make some soup

soup will fix the litany of woes i've neglected to catalogue here

the queen of corona

yesterday, in the corona

unfeasibly loud

repeated a millionty times as i negotiated the rainy wet friday afternoon traffic

"i talked to him last night

he hates my guts, we had a fight"

the queen of corona

today, in the corona
oh so VERY loud
"and i'm the only one who laughs
at your jokes when they are so bad
and your jokes are always bad
but they're not as bad as this"
sigh

past, (wedding) present, future

i am up far too late for it to be good for anyone at all

and i'm looking through the past via youtube, and then i found this

mygirlcarrie and i love the wedding present

i used to listen to the wedding present all the time with rhys in 1992 - we played a lot of hit parade 1 on vinyl, and watched a lot of 'dick york's wardrobe' on VHS

this is a nice little song, and david gedge is still wicked cool awesome

and i like the way i look in my red dress and boots, finally realising my dream of playing guitar in a creditable indie rock band

see - all good things come to those who wait

you hear that, universe?

ALL GOOD THINGS to THOSE WHO WAIT

lolcat of the day

i'm still up from yesterday

so in chirstworld,  it's still monday

sigh

it's ALWAYS monday

the queen of corona

monday, in the corona

VERY LOUD

"you think it's easy but you're wrong

i am not one half of the problem"

atonement

• walk on treadmill - 5 minutes
• boxing - 30 minutes

but i got points for identifying the event i'm going to train for

i'll save these points up and trade them in

periodic table

the temptation to get into (another) email vendetta is incredibly strong

but

(apply resigned tone here)

i'll

be

the

grown up

friday, i'm (not) in love

tonight i decided to retire to my awesome bed for the evening and watch movies and eat junk food.  this was in response to several situations, which i shall outline for you thus:

• i was still feeling a little under the weather after getting food poisoning last night after going out for dinner and consuming vietnamese seafood broth.  this was delicioso and comforting at the time, especially since i have a cold,  but by 2am this morning i really felt less than ideal, and poor chirsty spent a reasonable amount of time talking down the great white telephone

• when i sat up and reached over to get my glasses when i was sick in the middle of the night, i knocked over my glass of just juice tropical bubbles lite directly onto the multi power board, which immediately started making a fizzing and crackling sound.  so at the same time i was retching, i was hurriedly trying to cut the power to the extension cord and minimise the possibility of electrocution and/or electrical fire and/or localised apocalypse

• i am old and alone with nobody to love me and mice will eat my face in my sleep

• today i had to try on bridesmaid dresses with the other bridesmaid who is 22 years old and a size 6 

so, i rented "zombieland" because i love it, and i had read about "away we go" in my empire magazine just last night, so i had to get that when i saw it on the shelf

now, zombieland was even more awesome than the first time round, and not just because there was no sexual tension a la third date distraction like the last time, but because i knew when my favourite and best parts were coming up.   i could notice a whole lot of other stuff that i missed the first time because i thought i was going to hold hands with that boy, or that he might try and touch my leg.  but it was also kind of sad and hollow, because i really miss having someone to share this kind of cool movie with. 

away we go was really lovely and funny and sweet and quirky and beautiful.  and it made me cry because of all those thing, but it also shows exactly what i want, what i'm missing in my life and what i can't do a damn thing about getting.  the scenes that really got to me in regard to that empty and lacking part of my life were the ones when verona and burt are lying face to face, really close, talking and laughing and touching and making jokes.  i miss creating that exclusive world that you don't share with anyone else, that tiny world for two that exists just for the pair of you.

see, the thing is, you're supposed to be happy with your job, your career, your friends, your extra curricular activities.  it's not cool to say you really want something you have very little control over getting, and that the other stuff is just a distraction from what you're really wanting.  when that's what you want, it's what you seem to see everywhere. 

there's probably a lolcat about it, you know.  and it's not this one

the queen of corona

today, in the corona

EXCEPTIONALLY LOUD

repeated approximately 17 times whilst negotiating book sale traffic and parking buildings

"but if you're willing to call my machine

flip the coins and watch me light up"

atonement

i was running super late for the ghyme, because i was looking at fml

so

• chirstrainer - 4 min
• boxing - 30 min

and when i had to do thirty thousand million punches without stopping i made a sound like a wookiee

which is also the same sound i make when i get into a very hot and fabulous shower after boxing

the queen of corona

today, in the corona

very loud

"i can't confront you, i never could do"

atonement

i'm a little bit tired after all my high powered scientific research today, so i'll be succinct

• bike - 8km
• boxing - 30 min
• bike - 14 km

and for the second year in a row i got to finish the world fitness centre adventure race for green team

and yes, as i clicked over that final kilometre reading i raised my arms up in the "woo hoo"! for the virtual photographers who were swarming over me, to post my picture in the "imaginary times"

mirror images

i might sub rachel weisz in for my shift this afternoon and see if anyone notices

atonement

 

i really have underestimated how hard it is to get out of my awesome bed on a crisp saturday morning after working late shift the night before

 

it gets harder when you decide to eat your healthy pre-ghyme breakfast of diet pears, diet yoghurt and special k in front of season 3 of '30 rock'

 

anyway

• walk/run on treadmill - 7km

and i may have made a new ghyme friend

huzzah!

six feet and taller

nate fisher does not like girls with messy rooms

atonement

i really, really, really wanted to do an hour of biking before the boxing
but my bed was too awesome
so i stayed in bed far too long and thought great big deep thoughts (AS ALWAYS)
therefore

• biking - 10 km
• boxing - 30 min

now, it looks so little to say "boxing - 30 min"  but embedded within that session are the following

• push ups (full) - 50
• step ups - 50 EACH SIDE
• swiss ball roll outs - 50

and now i am making some very excellent progress in my room like a grown up
not at all like a teenage boy
not at all like the teenage boy of the gym owner who also has an untidy room

i am totally rocking it - maturity styles

in your face, universe

atonement

• walk/run on treadmill - 5km
• lat pull downs (30kg) - 50
• seated row (24kg) -50

soup and toast for tea
the fixings are in the kitchen
i'm pretty tired, so could someone please make it for me?

naughty birthday pixie

this is the naughty birthday pixie who possessed me on saturday night

she drank approximately 900 drinks (there is photographic evidence suggesting this might be a somewhat conservative estimate)

she ate a lot of excellent chinese food at the asian on moray place

she indulged in excellently choreographed dance presentations (i'm considering whether i'm going to post that clip or not....hmmmm....)

she also indulged in naughty birthday pixie shenanigans, hijinks, antics, malarkey and capers

and

she had a bloody awesome time

although it did take her until monday morning to recover from the bloody awesome hangover

and wearing sunglasses at 5pm on an overcast sunday night to her family birthday dinner made her two and a bit year old nephew say "i'm wearing my sunglasses cos i want to be a cool dude like aunty chirsty"

the only down points were when she did manage to lose my old lady magnifying piece of plastic from my purse - and also the girl at kfc the next day didn't like how my visa card was all sticky with drink

so, until next year

thank you, naughty birthday pixie :)

atonement

miraculously, i was shiny bright today after the extreme hijinks partaken in on saturday night

yesterday i was sure i had killed too many braincells to function as a productive member of society

so, to counteract the caloric damage from the 900 drinks i had on saturday i decided i'd better go back to the gym today

• run/walk on treadmill - 7km
• boxing - 30 minutes

in the boxing session i did 55 press ups!!!!! during this time i created a little sweatmonster family on the mat, complete with baby sweatmonster, daddy sweatmonster and pet duck

they like to go to the park for excursions

good grief

i kind of feel weird about my birthday, because the anniversary of my mother's death is the day after - therefore they're forever and inextricably linked

- initially cemented together by spending the entirety of my 14th in the hospital

inevitably i try and do something elaborate and entertaining and distracting for my birthday, which usually means i can blame my shithouse mood the next day on my hangover rather than face the fact that twenty one years later i still miss my mum

this year the calendar has aligned in such a way that i get the in-your-face triple play :

friday 7 may - chirst's birthday

saturday 8 may - jan's anniversary

sunday 9 may - mother's day

i also like to try and take three or four days off work around this time to incorporate the drinking and denial. this year, with a cunning combination of rostered days off, stat days in lieu and one single annual leave day i've managed to finagle six days off in a row, which has been great

i spent the evening of my birthday eating junk food, wearing my cool new earrings and watching "how i met your mother" with bajoolies, which was fantastically hilarious

for tonight i've amassed an eclectic group of very awesome and amazing women to go forth to the asian in moray place to eat, drink and be merry with me, which will act dually as a birthday celebration and somewhat of a cushion against the everpresent undertow of someone missing

i just have to gather the ingredients for pre-dinner cosmopolitans (there'd better be limes aplenty to be found tomorrow, dunedin, that's all i can say), tidy my room, zip myself into my party frock and i'll be ready to repress in style

sunday though - that might be the tricky one to stick for the landing

kiss the wine

ok - you know i had to do it - here is my terror twilight trio, truly - the third thing

this is much more like what being 35 will be like once i get up and stop languishing/festering in bed and thinking about far too many things altogether

more fun and more happy and more friends and more wine and more everything that can be currently located in my immediate vicinity - "relationships, hey hey hey"

staying in bed and hiding doesn't mean it's not happening, so i might as well be more engaged in it

and.......................go!

honey i'm a prize and you're a catch and we're a perfect match

this video is what it's like to turn 35

everything is not as shiny and bright and bouncy and happy as you thought it would be, like it has been other times

the colours are a bit washed out and tired, just like your own jaded good self

and so this is terror twilight trio, truly, take two

"i've been thinking long and hard about the things you said to me, like a bitter stranger"

too much thinking, so

"pour me out"

in fact, pour me out at pier 24

they have excellent astrolabe sauvignon blanc and i swear, i hear it calling my name from here

feed my thrill

i can't stop listening to pavement

can'twon'tcan'twon'tshan't

this song is one of three running in constant loop in my head at the moment - the terror twilight trio, truly

i love how happy mark ibold looks, like, all the time

also i totally love stephen malkmus' fresh moves

"harness your hopes to the folks with the liquor"

okeydokey, will do

"let's get down to brass tacks and start it"

atonement

wednesday

• run/walk on treadmill - 10.5km
• one hundred thousand very difficult strengthening exercises

when i did the walking on the treadmill, i discovered that i can walk at 7.0 speed if i listen to "so long, baby" by the wedding present (thanks to mygirlcarrie ) - check it out and just appreciate how fast my ridiculously short legs were trotting, especially when the tall giraffe like lady beside me was walking quite comfortably at 8.0 speed!

thursday

• bike - 7km
• boxing - 30 min

consequently, as a result of the overatonement, i feel less than ideal today

it's a possibility that i might not live to see 35

lolcat of the day

i was quite tired today
and i met my friend from work for lunch
we went to the good oil on george st
and i looked up
and wondered how on earth she could be saying something without moving her mouth
and immediately came to the conclusion that i could read her mind and we were communicating telepathically
it took a good disorientating five seconds for me to realise it was the woman seated behind her that i couldn't see talking

it's just like that time after i watched "phenomenon" and i kept trying to make the remote control jump into my hand with my mind

i'm still not 100% willing to let it go that i can't do magical telekinetic feats

atonement

today was terribly long and taxing at the place of the work

i would go so far as to say it was stresstacular

and i ran away from the place of work over an hour late

straight to world where i thought i would do some rowing for the race

but i couldn't because all the rowing machines were in use

so

• crosstrainer - 7 min


• boxing - 30 min

and i tried to tell richard i couldn't do the hard pull up thing on the bar because i was an amoeba

and then i fell over and banged my head just to prove my point

also i had to explain the concept of jumping the shark

sigh

my single cell is overworked

atonement

i went to the gym after work today

and by after work i mean after i left at 1535 and went home and fell face down on my bed and fell into a stuporous doze for half an hour or so because i spent the better part of the late afternoon and early evening yesterday drinking 5 jugs of beer with my lady cathy at mitchells tavern which is 30 seconds walk from my house and i was quite impossibly jaded by the end of business today

so i finally got to world at around 5, which meant i had an hour before they closed

instead of riding the bike like i thought i would have to do (and i was looking forward to gym trashing it up again), i discovered that we are now rowing across cook strait

bonza beauty :P

on friday when i was running beside my teammate he mentioned my rowing feat from last year, and said "don't worry, i told the others you'd carry us through the rowing again"

yikes, i thought to myself

• rowing - 7km (33 minutes)

and when i sat down at the rowing machine it was totally like on charlie's angels when that guy skydives out of the plane and pulls his face mask off and you see it's drew barrymore and she says "damn i hate to fly"

damn i hate to row