i've been sprung doing a few questionable things this year. it makes you turn into a lying teenager at 34
in my 'glass half full' state of mind that i am trying cultivate with my new neural pathways that i buy on a plan ($85 a week) i've packed my gym bag for the morning. this will necessitate getting up at 5.15am, huzzah!
also in preparation for going to sleep at an early hour (better get a move on right smart, then) i've combined the last of my four mac's spring tide low carb beers with my handy dandy notebook i mean night sedation. it works a treat, and none of that pesky lying awake worrying about everything in the big bad world and what i should have said and not said and written and done and what will i do tomorrow and will it be okay i don't think i'm getting any thinner but i'm certainly stronger it will be okay it will be okay STOP!
when things get that bad i like to pretend that my toes are situated over the home keys on a keyboard and type out words using correct touch typing procedure. it's quite calming and soothing without being drugs and alcohol and cigarettes. bajoolies has also noticed in extreme times of (di)stress i like to do a little rhythmic counting with my fingers
the toes and the typing - secret and hidable
the rapid finger counting - a little more in the public eye
oh no, i see the aftermath of the muesli bar situation that followed the emergency cheese sandwich. even i am smart enough to know that there's no fucking point drinking low carb beer if you're going to eat sandwiches and muesli bars. or maybe that is the point - drink the low carb beer so you can carb supplement yourself as you see fit. yes, yes, i can clearly see this is the point being made right in the now, POW!
righto, even i can clearly ascertain that it was bedtime at least an hour ago
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